Thursday, March 12, 2009

An Open Letter to the Mirror on the Table

Dear Mirror and/or Napkin in the Middle of the Table;

You're not pretty. I know a lot of hotels and conference centers think you are but I'm here to tell you you're not. Contrary to popular belief, you do not make the centerpiece 'pop.' In fact, you make it look real bad. So bad in fact, that I feel like I've been transported back into the '80s when I see you. And trust me, not many good things came out of the '80s so this isn't a complement.

I begrudgingly admit that I've been forced to use you in past events. And it's not because I wanted to. It's because someone thought you were 'pretty.' You can only imagine the heart attack I almost had when I heard you described as 'pretty.' ARGH!

Just last week I wrote a letter to your friend Wrinkled Linen and told him what I thought. Truth be told, I'd rather see him at an event then you. Trust me though, that's not saying a lot about either of you.

So, as I put your friend Wrinkled Linen on notice I must do the same for you. That's why I'm letting my readers know that they should never use you or a napkin in the center of the table lest they are throwing an 80s themed prom.

In true hopes of never seeing you again,
~Jodi

7 comments:

Unknown said...

I love it! Anomynously sending email link to hotels....

Anonymous said...

So, so true. Mirrors are the enemy for photographers too!

Great post!

Anonymous said...

Brilliant Jodi! You send that mirror back to the 80s where it belongs!

Anonymous said...

You're hilarious, Jodi! I think this is great :)

jessica@miphotobooth.com said...

Hmmm... I think this post is going to put a damper on my next business venture... Reflections Mirror Company- for all your centerpiece needs! (In light of the above post, I should mention that I am just kidding here)

Joyful Weddings and Events said...

Oh, my goodness- couldn't agree with you more! I have done everything in my power to discourage clients from using mirrors.

Anonymous said...

*lol* Love it! I may write a similar letter addressed to Ugly Outdated Decor Caterers Use on the Buffet.